COUGAR SCREAM

The Softball Tournament, which started rolling last Wednesday is now into the second bracket of play. The games have been enjoyed not only by participants but likewise by spectaters. The usual amount of good ball is hitting a normal percentage but the amount of personal and collective "kidding" is bursting the barriers.

The tournament got underway between the First Division and the E Division. The Sparkles had too many volts, amps, or what have you - and snowed under the Furious First by the avalanche of 27-7. Free hitting was the order of the day and the E-Boys took every advantage. Ensign Dundon donned the officials mask. "The life of an umpire is not an easy one"--quote he.

While all this was going on, the F Division heckled, infuriated, and pounded out a 25-11 win over the 2nd Division. Lieutenant Hooper's lads were in excellent form while Lieutenant Hunter's started too late to drive them across the plate. A later challenge is in the offing and ye scribe does not want the job of umpiring that one--but definitely!

Captain McKean's Marines played six divisions! After all, ya can't expect sea-going-soldiers to be that good. But they were--almost! The score: 7-5 and the winning team was a combination of the glamour boys of the H-C-CR-CS-L and N Divisions.

Thursday afternoon brought forth the following results: PF Division won by default from the Third Division end ditto the Sixth Division from the A Division.

The R Division set condition something-or-other on the Fourth Division and walked off with a 10-2 margin. While the S Division hung one on the Fifth Division by the tune of 13-9.

In peacetime and wartime, during national disaster and when there is no general emergency, the Red Cross is indispensable. No agency could replace it. It has also become an integral part of the Navy, and its service to Navy personnel is covered by Navy regulations and enumerated in Bureau of Navigation Bulletin 201. This service includes arranging for relief in distress among families; assistance in locating or communicating with families that have become separated from the man in service; adjustment of unfavorable conditions at home to discharge or furlough plans; verification of death illness or other home conditions of an emergent nature; furnishing information concerning such matters as pensions, insurance, government claims and relief programs; securing medical-social histories and other data for use of medical officers in hospitals; adjusting problems of patients, and help in arranging rehabilitation and vocational training for those given medical discharges; coordinating and conducting recreational activities in Navy Hospitals.

All these services are available through Red Cross Field Directors stationed on shore establishments and at Naval Bases.
The annual Roll Call is now being conducted. We of the Navy ought to subscribe not only because Red Cross activities help us, but also because we owe help to others in distress in the nation. The Red Cross is the institution which interprets so well our instinctive desire to extend a helping hand of compassion and sympathy. JOIN NOW!

Once again the ship's baseball team took to the field. Again they emerged victorious, their team whipping the Receiving Station's team 15 to 8 in a hard fought battle.

In the Cougar's first encounter of the season a while back, which was won 23 to 3, they were still in the process of being molded. On Thursday, however, it was a self confident, well rounded and aggressive aggregation that played the game.

That the Receiving Station team was an outfit of no mean ability is shown by the fact that they led at the end of the second inning 2 to 1. Whatever illusions of victory they might have had however were blasted by the results of the third inning.

The Cougars, resolving to take the situation firmly in hand, came to bat in the third with gritted teeth. They were going to show that they were a scrappy bunch and could come from behind to win. When the dust cleared away the Cougars had literally broken the backs of their opponents' resistance and had pounded over seven runs. From then on, the game was a breeze. At the end of the sixth-when the game was called on account of darkness--the score stood 15 to 8 in the Cougars favor.

Again the players were substituted freely with good results. In addition pep, precision and polish were apparent in the team and the uniforms made them look like a championship outfit. On the risk of becoming trite may I repeat. You still "Ain't seen nothin' yet"! The line ups are as follows:

Haws	S.S.
Doctorman	S.S.
McCormick	F.B.
Scazo	C.F.
Stappler	L.F.
Gross	L.F.
Coolman	T.B.
Campbell	T.B.
Taylor	C.
Myers	C.
Davis	R.F.
DiPolina	R.F.
Stanton	P.
Gibbons	2 B.
Flora	C.
P. T.V.

A Spanish priest has stated that Alaskan missionaries never should mention hell to Eskimos because the natives might decide they would want to go there to keep warm.

"The first preachers told the Eskimos about hell, but the natives expressed a desire to go there to keep warm and to keep from hauling wood," Father Segundo Llorento said.

Eskimos at his mission have to haul firewood 150 miles.

----It is estimated that each hour 6,200 babies are born, and about 4,600 persons are laid to rest; 2,500 couples are married, and 85 are divorced. Fifteen homicides take place in the civilized (?) world, while 200,000 crimes are reported.

----Textile industries convert approximately 1,000,000 pounds of cotton; 300,000 pounds of wool; 100,000 Ibs. of silk; and 800,000 pounds of rayon into fabrics.

----The world consumes 65,000,000 pounds of potatoes, 8,000,000 pounds of meat; and 80,000,000 pounds of bread. Hens lay 2,500,000 eggs. While 1,500,000 quarts of wine and 500,000 quarts of beer are -consumed. Coffee is the world's favorite beverage, 50,000,000 cups being consumed each hour. The world's hourly tobacco bill is $1,500,000.00.

----About 700 new automobiles are built and more than 170,000 barrels of petroleum are produced hourly. Automobiles accidents in the world, mostly in America, claim the lives of eight victims.

----The coffers of the world are enriched by $12,000.00 worth of mined gold. Five million telephone conversations take place, and over 65,000 telegrams are sent. The post offices of the world are deluged with more than 1,000,000,000 letters, post cards and miscellaneous missives bearing postage of upward of $25,000,000.00.

----Approximately 180,000 feet of photographic films are used. Paper mills produce about 2,000 tons of paper, and more than 1,000,000 copies of newspapers, periodicals and various magazines are printed.

The statesmen of Great Britain saw many advantages in the colonization of America, and as an inducement, the colonists were offered religious freedom in the New World and the opportunity to acquire land. These inducements attracted many people but the difficulties and hardships made except the most determined hesitate. The voyages were made in small ships scarcely larger than submarine chasers. The ships were overcrowded and had no means of ventilation and no method of preserving fresh food. The voyages frequently lasted 3 or 4 months. Scurvy was common and epidemics of smallpox and scarlet fever frequent. Piracy flourished on the high seas during this period and mutinies were not uncommon. Navigation was uncertain; the charts very unreliable and there were no lighthouses in America; sextants were inaccurate and vessels had no method of determining longitude. The Mayflower sailed for Virginia but landed in Cape Cod; and many colonists successfully braved the hardships of the long voyage. only. to-be shipwrecked on the shore of their new country. However, the dangers of the forest and the abundant supply of fish off the coast soon attracted many of the settlers to a life at sea. Poor roads and hostile Indians made travel by land difficult or impossible and consequently transportation of freight and most travel was made by water. The sea was more important to the early colony than the railroad is to the modern village. In New England there was ample water power for saw mills, the lumber could be obtained from the forests at almost no cost. Consequently ship building soon flourished and a large portion of the population earned their living by building ships or by sailing them. With the development of colonial manufacturing, freight was no longer transported merely from one colony to another but to all ports of Europe; and as the whales were driven off shore, the New Englanders pursued them further and further to sea until colonial ships were operating from the Arctic to the Anarctic. On the eve of the Revolution, the Colonies were building about 150 vessels a year. In 1775, Lloyd's Register gave British tonnage of shipping as 605,545 and colonial as 373,618.

The custom of piping a boat alongside originated in the practice of piping as a form of cheering or welcome to the visiting personage in the barge or gig that was approaching.

The use of sideboys originated in the practice of holding conferences on the flagship, and of inviting officers to dinner, while at sea, for in the days of sail the duration of periods at sea was much longer than it is now. In order to go aboard a ship at sea it was often necessary to hoist the visiting officer aboard in the boatswain's chair, the pipe being used for "hoist away" and "avast heaving." As age and seniority brought with it an increase in proportions and weight, the more senior an officer was the more sideboys needed to hoist him aboard.

Hence an admiral needed eight sideboys while a young lieutenant could be hoisted aboard very satisfactorily with two sideboys.

The custom of tending the side with concomitant piping the side by the boatswain's mate is one of long standing. The boatswain's pipe itself is one of the oldest and most distinctive pieces of personal nautical equipment.

A pipe or flute was used in the Roman and Grecian galleys of antiquity to keep stroke. In the Crusade of 1248 the pipe was used as the signal to attack.

Salesman: "And what kind of a motor horn would you like sir? Do you care for one with a good loud blast ?"
Sailor: "No, I am being transferred to Boston, I just want one with a refined sneer."

Mistress: "You want to leave us, Mary? I thought you were quite comfortable What is it for, something private?"
Mary: "No, Ma'am. Its a Marine Corporal."

Aviator (after crackup): "I was trying to make a record."
Farmer: "Well, you're the first man in these parts who climbed down a tree without having climbed up it first, so I guess you made it."

Mrs. Smart: "A woman is judged by her company."
Mrs. Blount: "Yes, but not until after they have left."

Mary had her little sailor' man,
Insured his life one day;
The little man is dead and gone,
But Mary,--she's O.K.

Sailor: "Gee, but I would like to make your dreams come true."
Girl Friend: "You try and I'll slap your face."

A Scot was engaged in an argument with a conductor as to whether the fare was 5 or 10 cents. Finally the disgusted conductor picked up the Scotsman's suitcase and tossed it off the train, just as they passed over a bridge. It landed with a splash.
"Mon," screamed Sandy, "isn't it enough to try to overcharge me, but now you try to drown my little boy."

"Don't be downhearted," said the sailor to the suffering rookie. "Seasickness has never killed anyone."
"Don't say that," moaned the rookie, "it's only the hope of dying that has kept me alive so far!"

And then there was the condemmed golfer who asked the hangman, "Mind if I take a couple of practice swings ?"

The new colored parson, calling for the first time on Monday, was puzzled to hear her call the children "Eenie." "Meenie", "Minie" and "Henry".
"Why do you name him 'Henry'?"
"We want no Mo."

"What did you say Harry's business is now?"
"Stocks and blondes."

S Div. Sailor: "What a night! What a moon! What a combination!" Philadelphia Phillie: "Heavens! Is that showing too?"

Physician: "This man's condition is not due to drink. He's been drugged."
Policeman (turning pale): "I'm afraid ye're right, sir. I drugged him all the way--a hundred yards or more."

Neighbor: "Yer ain't lookin' too happy today, Mrs. Jones. 'What's up?"
Mrs Jones: "What's up? Jones has been promising all week to take me and Hilly to see Charlie Chaplin, and this morning, half-an hour ago, just as we were getting ready, his strike was declared off, and he had to go back to work. That's what's up!"

The devil looked up from his daily register. "I see you got a fellow named -Sherman here."
"Yes," said Beezlebub, "he came in with the last lot."
"Well, see if he is any relation to a General of that name who said war was hell, and if he is, give him the works. I ain't going to stand for people slandering hell that way!"

Perhaps the oldest and most far fetched yam having come to the ears of the editor comes from the days of the horse and buggy. It was related as an absolutely true fact. The names which were given are omitted here. Our Navy had bidden goodby to the sailing ship but not to the old timer who gave the sailor his rough tough reputation and picturesque tradition.

The story of our subject begins ashore toward the end of a lovely tipsy liberty. At the moment he is a sailor on horse back (not Jack London). He has hired old Nell to take him back to his boat.

Our friend is not content with riding to the dock. He swings the horse to the ship and boldly marches on board, requesting permission to come aboard and have his horse hauled out to, the boom.

Another yam that started with true fact comes from the early days of our own submarines. In those days our subs were classed with sub chasers and other craft that are secured alongside the dock without the necessity of maintaining a watch on board.

On this occasion the usual method of securing alongside was carried out and all hands went ashore. The next morning when the skipper returned, the sub wasn't at the dock where he left it the night before. His mystification was dispelled somewhat when he asked the mess attendant on the dock where the ship was. The boy replied with a vertical motion of his index finger and the words "Down there".

The most familiar yam to the deck force will probably be the tale of the slightly deaf Chief Bos'n. This character had to relie on the anchor detail to relay the orders the Captain shouted from the bridge to him.

On this occasion the bos'n mate had a run-in with the Chief Bos'n. He swore to avenge his maltreatment and HOW HE DID.

The ship was being moved into drydock for an overhaul. All was well until the Captain shouted down his first order--"let go Number One line."

The old Bos'n said to his mate "What did he say, huh?" and was told, "He said, 'Let go the starboard anchor' ". The old Bos'n gave the necessary orders and away went the starboard anchor.

The Captain on the bridge was fit to be tied? and the words that came from the end of the megaphone are not for print.

The unperturbed old Bos'n again questioned his mate about what the Captain said. He received the following reply: "He said 'let go port anchor' ". Further details of the story after the port anchor went down are needless.

All Stanley-Warner theatres in Philadelphia and vicinity are extending special privileges in admission prices to all officers and men of the Navy and Marine Corps who attend the theatres in uniform. Special prices are as follows:

All theatre admissions up to and including 40 cents -- price 20 cents plus taxes prevailing at time of purchase.

All admissions over 40 cents--price 25 cents plus taxes prevailing at time of purchase.

Teacher: "And it rained for forty days and forty nights, what happened then ?"
California Tot: The natives said it was very unusual."